Jett,
I feel awful that we just met and I am already feeling upset at you. I read your letter and I feel you placed the word love in several places where you should have just used lust.
Through your whole message I did not feel that you felt true love for anyone. Did these women feel the same as you did? Maybe you are like my ex-boyfriend and you get to claim that you were loved but you did not love back. I will tell you just as I told him. I know you and the hottie would never work in the end because you built the whole relationship on lies and deceit. Sounds like you could have been responsible for breaking someones heart. The girls you cheated with did the others a favor in the end.
Sadly it sounds like you have no regrets as to the life you lived and the feelings of the nagging girls. I wonder if they had a reason to nag? Maybe they knew you didn’t love them or maybe they didn’t trust you. Usually I find with guys they hate the nagging but will never change the things we are nagging about. I hate the things you do over and over so I nag over and over.
Here you are now unhappy again and still not in love. I also wonder if your current wife knows of your misery in the marriage? Is this silent suffering fair to you or her? Would you cheat on her now and would it cause her pain? I have to say it puzzles me that you say you love yourself and you still are not being honest. I believe that finding your true self is being honest to first you and then the others around you. If is is love that you seek you may find it better to give love than to expect it. Sometimes the truth hurts but lies kill and darken the soul.
Dunbfounded,
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